szarabasjka

fill to this PROMPT (Based on 'In the Flesh'
There was a zombie apocalypse, everyone who died in 2009 rose from the grave. (it's not infectuous, if you get bitten you don't turn)

Scientists found a treatment for the zombies, to bring back their original personalities. Their bodies are still deadish, but other than not needing to either eat or drink and not feeling any pain, and only being able to die if their brains are destroyed, they're for the most part just people.

Jensen died, committing suicide, and now he's back in his home town, where people already couldn't stand him because he was gay. His parents took him back in, but they and his siblings have a hard time dealing with his suicide.

People in town don't like the ideas of the zombies coming back home. There are laws protecting the partially deceased, but not everyone obeys them.

Jared was a classmate of Jensen and part of the militia that used to fight the zombies.

He's shocked to see Jensen. And he has a hard time dealing with the fact that Jensen is ... different, but he still loves him. And learns to realize that people like Jensen aren't evil.

Would love a romance, just no graphic sex pretty please.)

Title: beating heart

Author: me
Kink: romance, J2, suicide, violence, several characters death (including main characters), homophobia, non explicit m/m non con h/c.

When the zombies appeared for the first time everyone wanted nothing more than kill them again.

Among those who wanted nothing more than to kill them was Jared Padalecki, he organized the militia in his town, mostly because he had no reason to hide and wait, and because he was the only one who faced one of these creatures when it entered a house to kill the occupant before he beheaded it. Yes, IT. Because nobody will ever convince him they’re humans.

It took them six months to realize those monsters are actually people, all of them death during 2009 between February 12^th and October 10^th.

Zombies, they called them, rotten, was the name on the streets. And, from all those who fought them, Jared were the one they’ll never convince.

Even after doctors found out a way to make their hearts beat again and let people know that with just a simple treatment that consisted in repeated fresh blood transfusion, rottens could go back to life, like real life, it’ll take a little more than ten months before they were fully human once the treatment started.

***

Jensen sat up breathing hard. Eyes wide open in surprise and fear. He started coughing and felt his head heavy and foggy.

He felt as if he slept for weeks, and he felt this hollow feeling, the emptiness in his chest, Jensen moved his hand to touch where he felt the space empty.

After a couple minutes he rubbed his eyes and blinked stupidly, the hurting on his chest is far worse now than it was.

He remembers he left the house, he remembers he took dad’s gun and remembers his parents’ words “Can’t you at least try. I can’t even face my friends.” His mother said almost crying. “What you expected? Normal boys are gonna pick on you, you’re a fucking weirdo.”

He gets up, holding his chest, there’s dirt on his clothes and he tried to shake it off the best he can.

He was so far from the city, so far, he had to walk for hours, he tried hitchhiking but every car just sped up at the sight of him, some things never change, he thought.

By the time he got home the sun was going down, he had no keys so he knocked, but his mom was nowhere to be seen, he shouted for her and his neighbor, Mrs. O’Brien opened the door and gasped surprised before running inside.

He finally heard steps and his heart felt heavy, it actually surprised him, as it surprised him to hear the siren and the patrol car stopping just few feet away of him.

“Jensen?” it was his mom, finally his mom.

“Momma.” He let out, his first words since he woke up, and his throat felt raspy and weird, he tried hard not to cry, but the sight of his mother opening the screen door and holding him was too much.

“Baby... You’re back. I can’t believe you’re back.”

Then the police microphone filled the air.

“Ma’am, move away from the zombie please.”

And Jensen’s mom gasped and backed away while two officers grabbed him immobilized him and throwed him to the floor, Jensen was stunned, it was as if all this were part of a bad cops movie, as if all this wasn’t real, could be his dream. It just didn’t make any sense, during the while ordeal he remained calmed, he just called for his mom now and then because he felt confused, not because the cuffs or the pulls and tugs were hurting him, actually he can’t even remember how it felt to hug his mom after all this time.

***
Jared was sleeping, thinking about the great amount of people that came back to life to terrorize his relatives and once- loved ones.

He just had a beer too many after they found a female rotten eating on a kitchen, right after he punched a man dead and kidnapped a boy. Doctors said they’ll treat him in confinement. With the rest of the new ones before giving him back to the police for his trial.

Some of his men are picketing the center but he’s just too tired. He might have slept at some point because the next thing he remembers is the annoying ringing of his phone, over and over without respite.

“WHAT!” he barked at it when finally reaching for it.

*Jared, there’s even more of those fuckers in the containment center, come over, you have to see them, a fucking baby!! They found a fucking baby who doesn’t drink milk but blood. The fucking monster…* Gen kept talking. She hated the rottens just as much as Jared.

“I’ll be there.”

Jared’s life was simple, he worked on a factory, as manager, then went training with his militia and then picketing those special health centers for rottens, and he felt those creatures had no right to demand for resources living ones could use.

Sometimes, Jared used to think that if at least his brother was one of those who came back, but no, Jeff was killed and nothing could change that.

***

The police car stopped in front of the police station, but instead of going inside that building they walked to the one next to it, it was a health center for partially living. Jensen walked slowly, his wrists tied behind his back and eyes casted down. The cop was using gloves and it made him remember thing.

“You fucking fagot.” That tall guy with the brown hair shouted and Jensen felt the impact of the orange against his head. “Why don’t you kill yourself freak, all creatures like you should die.” The gang consisting in eight boys, all of them used to be his classmates, laughed and a rain of oranges landed on him. Jensen did his best to shield his face and his glasses. “Or maybe move to San Francisco where you could die of some weird gay disease!” The pickup truck sped up and he was left surrounded by a cloud of dust. Jensen walked the short path to Misha’s farm.

“Jensen?” Misha ran to him and when he had no answer he moved to hold his face and caress his cheek. “You okay?” and let out a surprised gasp and a groan as he cleaned the blood from his temple where something hit so hard it split his skin open. “You’ll be okay sweetheart. I’ll take care of it.”

Do you remember the feeling of the sun on your skin on those first days of spring? When you just want to stand and soak in on the light and warmth? When everything smells fresh and clean? When there’s a promise of new things coming? Hope and love and warmth? that’s what Misha was for Jensen, and his hands on Jensen face meant only one thing. Those bullies could come with rocks next time he still wouldn’t care.

“Jensen?” this time was his mother. She came running followed by his father, dressed on a sharp suit.

It was his father who ordered to the officer to carry him inside as fast as he could.

Once in an empty office, all by themselves Mr. Ackles moved closer to him.

“Why are you back?”

Jensen looked at his father and it came back to him, those same words he heard from his bullies, from those who used to hurt him and Misha, the same hate coming from his father.

“I don’t know.”

“Where were you while… all this... all this time.”

Jensen once more looked around to his mother, to the window and the calendar on the desk.

“I don’t know how long has it been?”

“Jensen.” his mother got close. “You died five years ago, a Tuesday, October the 6^th.”

Everything came to his mind, everything, from the guy, what was his name? Tall and long haired, he punched Misha, and Jensen made him regret it.

He remembered the cop, the new sheriff, the one who put his fingers inside him, the one who called him a slut and raped him. The bastard let the tall guy, what was his name? The sheriff let him take pictures and everything.

He was too ashamed to tell his boyfriend, being the only gay guys in the whole county, stupid fucking rural Texas. He told his parents and they blamed him “if you were normal…”, “how can a normal man rape one of your kind?”, “you must have done something.”, but what hurt him the most were his father’s words “is not enough to have you? As disgusting as you are? You have to lie about poor Sheriff Anders too?”

He hung himself in the tree near the river, after a fight with Misha, he couldn’t let his boyfriend touch him, everything triggered memories of that man. Misha said they should give themselves some time. Jensen couldn’t see anything else.

“Did someone else saw him?” Mr. Ackles was talking to his wife and the lady only nodded. “Damn, he’ll have to stay with us then…”

“Can’t he stay here for a while? I mean…” Jensen looked at his mother feeling betrayed. “They have to start his treatment, right? Then he can go any other place in the world? To somewhere safe?”

Jensen wished he didn’t have to wake up.

***

Jared got to the entry of the center to see the car of Mayor Ackles there.

“Can you believe it?” Gen said once he was close enough. “The rotten brought up this morning? He’s the city Mayor’s son.”

Jared let out a huff of indignation.

“Hope he doesn’t expect us to be kind with him.” Jared had it present he was only 16 when the news of the guy that killed himself was whispered in school. He knew, that’s two days after Jared told Jeff he was scared because he thought he liked boys.

Jeff took a day and a half to talk to him again, but Jared didn’t mind waiting, Jeff said that he loved him and that no matter what he’d be on his side. “No one will bother you, you’re my brother, Jay, and I’m here for you.”

Jeff stopped going out with his friends that day.

Patients started coming out and people started shouting and throwing garbage at them. The words shouted were cruel and when Jared looked at them from outside, he only saw fear and anger and wished he had nothing to do with this.

“Rot in peace.” They repeated. “Go back to the hole.” And “dead bangers” were the most used phrases.

One of the rottens dared to flip at them while steering his wife and kids away from them and the riot started, there were only four police officers that were over run in a second.

Gen and her boyfriend had Molotov cocktails and lit them and started throwing the bottles to the center’s entrance door.

Part of being a partially diseased meant that the paleocortex takes over the functions of every other part of the brain, resulting in an enhanced strength and the inability to suppress anger. That’s why even the smallest and frailest rotten was dangerous. Jared was fighting off two little girls while their mother was begging for them to stop when he turned to see the fire, and the cops coming. He pushed the kids away and ran to help his friends.

Jared took one of the bottles and turned to Genevieve who was shouting to an old lady coming out holding her husband, she was calmed, so calmed you really had to look to notice she was a rotten. The man had her by the hand preventing her from running to the protesters and the small old lady was compliant to his husband’s pleas.

“Look at them.” He said angry pushing her and her boyfriend back. “They’re older than our parents Gen.”

Police entered with the anti riot squad and captured them all, it happened often so Jared didn’t care.

When asked, he said it was on his right to speak his mind, and he had the right to protect his family and friends against any threat.

“Congratulations asshole.” The officer huffed. “You won yourself a ten days imprisonment for attacking two minors.”

“Those monsters attacked ME!” he defended.

“Those kids have a medical condition that made them unable to stop themselves, you’re just a fucking bigot.” the guy shouted back. “Did you know they were killed by a drunk driver, from the same factory you work in? Did you know their parents were at the verge of divorce when they came back? They’re still 10 year old girls. So fuck you. And be grateful you’re not going to real jail.”

***

Jensen was ordered into a room and ordered again to take off his clothes. the dark suit was dirty and smelled like something stored for far too long. This was his best suit, the clothes he was buried in.

“Once you get the gown on, lay on that bed and I’ll be back.”

The nurse disappeared for over half an hour, and by the time she came back there were two giant orderlies with her.

“There’s a riot out there, as if we didn’t have enough with this creatures contaminating our place.”

Without any warning she stuck a thick needle on Jensen’s arm missing the vein, Jensen flinched out of instinct not real pain, but it felt uncomfortable when the lady started roaming with the needle under his skin causing a big blotchy spot on the crook of his arm.

“That hurts.”

Jensen said trying to make her stop, the lady rolled her eyes and informed him that partially deceased couldn’t really feel pain.

“Well, let me tell you I’m one of THEM, and I DO feel pain.”

The lady locked eyes with Jensen while the orderlies got close.

“Are we going to have a problem?” the lady took off the needle and stuck it back without any care. Jensen yelled in surprise and anger and pulled his arm making the lady fly away.

Shocked, Jensen got up and tried to say he was sorry, when one of the orderlies already had his hands in him twisting his arm back while the other had a giant needle and a straitjacket for him.

It was something he’d never could explain, it was just this orders in his head, threat, threat, attack, attack, attack, kill, kill. And he was on top of one of the men while the other was thrown across a window.

It was all a white and red fog until he was on his back, four of the security guards knocked out and the nurse had a minor concussion. Jensen was sent to the police station for a couple days, he was lucky, for once, that his father had some influence. He’d be there until a nurse or a doctor dared to touch this especially violent patient.

***

Jared woke up to see the door being opened. It was the stench that gave the other prisoner up, was a rotten.

“Here Padalecki, you’ll have a companion.”

Jensen was wearing the straitjacket and had a muzzle on. His arm was beating where the syringe broke his skin. He was still full of tranquilizers.

Jensen didn’t saw him until the next morning when the fog finally lifted enough.

Jared was pacing the cell half angry half nervous, being in a small piece with a freshly dug out rotten was never a good thing, one word without thinking would result in serious injury. And not to mention that this guy was almost his height and obviously was fit, add that to the enhanced strength and Damn! The corpse was dangerous.

Jensen saw the man pacing in the reduced space, tall and muscular, hiding his features under long hair, every now and then he could see a flash of hazel eyes, and his memories were flashing in his head like small explosions.

He saw Misha, and felt his hands in him, his mouth, heard his laughter and saw intense, ocean blue eyes full of love. He felt searing pleasure and then pain, something hurt so bad, it was too much.

“I just don’t get it! What have happened Jensen? Why I can’t even get close without you wanting to bolt?”

“Nothing, leave me alone!!”

“Maybe I will, maybe this is too fast, we should give us a time or something, until you decide what you want.”

“Hey, hey, calm down!!” Jared was against the wall, he was almost in the verge of calling for the guards, this one was dangerous, that much was obvious.

Jensen blinked his mouth free, his arms loose, the straitjacket were a bunch of rags on the floor and he was crying.

“Jesus Christ, what happened to you?” Jared Asked.

“I don’t fucking know, I woke up like this after almost five years gone… I wish I could go back to my grave.” Jensen sank to the floor right in the place he was, it was weird, he was crying.

“Yeah... well, I wish you could too.”

It irked Jared that Jensen after being so agitated at first spent the rest of the day sitting in the same place, eyes -beautiful eyes, let’s face it- fix on the same point around the doorknob, limbs still, the only thing that was moving was that gross line of dark unclogged blood running down his right forearm where surely he had an IV not long ago.

It was getting dark again when the door rattled and it opened, a tall mean looking nurse entered. “Jensen?” he asked turning from Jared to Jensen a couple times, until the one on the floor nodded. “My Name is Clark. I have to start your treatment, but you’ll stay here in confinement for the next two days, just to be sure this is working.” Jensen didn’t move. “Stop acting like a child, I mean it. Are we going to have a problem?” asked the man in a voice so raspy and so low that it felt like a bulldozer were moving closer, you know? That rumble that you feel?

Jensen got up and moved to one of the beds and sat on it without any word.

“You don’t remember me, do you?” asked Clark. “You’re Jensen Ackles, lacrosse hitter and baseball star, don’t you?” Jensen frowned but didn’t say a word. “I remember you, I was on South Perrette. I played for the wasps. Class of ’05.”

Jared snorted, he understood now, He went to North Perrette High School and apparently Jensen too, and according to Clark he was from Jeff’s class.

“My brother was there.” Jared commented. “Basketball pivot.”

Clark turned to see him and smiled “Jeff Padalecki, right?”

“Great.” Jensen Gritted. “Now we can be best friends and go to a bar and have beers talking about how fucking awesome this miserable town is.” He closed his eyes and Jared could swear he wasn’t breathing.

Clark finished his work and said good bye only to Jared, he said he was sorry for his loss. Jensen didn’t cared, he started remembering that guy, he broke his nose and two fingers after Jensen’s team won the championship. “I’m not gonna lose against you fag.” He said while standing on his hand.

“FUCK, really?” Jensen’s brain was still firing on its own and all that he said it out loud.

“You think I killed myself because I wanted to be the first bastard on the list?” And Jensen’s eyes snapped open. Misha used to joke about it *face it, Ackles, you’re straight, but you just want to be the first in my list of gay lovers.* Misha, he must be around still, maybe he was around still.

“ I just… things have changed, since your dad is the Mayor and…”

“Fantastic! Tell me. Do you know if Misha Collins still lives here? He bought the old Krushnic farm.”

Jared turned to Jensen angry as hell.

“NO, that fucking bastard is dead, and hopefully he’s not coming back.”

If Jensen were alive, if Jensen were normal he’d be crying, but instead of that, this still, cold heart only felt empty, more than before.

“Okay.” No emotion at all in his voice. Jensen went still again.